You don't have to rush to figure it out, either. You can just like him and like the idea of where it goes.
[The question catches Eliot off guard and his smile fades, and he looks away, thoughtful, but that touch of melancholy that only Caleb saw in him now, most of the time, and it's quiet when he finally answers.] I don't know. It's complicated. Quentin has a big heart, and he loves me. But it took a year of us with no other options for him to want more than to be friends, where I was enamored more or less the day I met him, even if I didn't do anything about it. And I put the brakes on, because that's usually what I do, but it didn't take him long to find a pretty lady to fall for too. If she'd asked, I think he would have made it just the two of them. And if I thought it'd make them happy, I'd have let them. But she never asked, and then she died. So it was just us and Teddy. We never talked about it, we just kept going.
If he asked, I'd say yes, because I can't say no to Q about anything that matters. But he needed more than me, and he didn't come to me until there wasn't any other option. Here, there's other options everywhere. I don't need it to be just us - and it's a moot point here, given it's illegal. But I don't think without that time with no one else there, I'd ever be his first choice. So part of me wouldn't want to try to be each other's only anything, because I don't want to find out for sure I couldn't be enough to keep him happy. I'd rather keep a touch of mystery to it. [Eliot smiles ruefully.] If that makes any sense at all, I have no idea.
[He reaches to squeeze Caleb's wrist lightly.] It's not greedy. But I'm happy to hear it. And yes. In this together, friends, lovers, most likely partners in crime at some point. So lets take in a very pretty blond together. And if once in a while you want a night alone with him, then I'll go make some trouble with Margo or Q.
no subject
[The question catches Eliot off guard and his smile fades, and he looks away, thoughtful, but that touch of melancholy that only Caleb saw in him now, most of the time, and it's quiet when he finally answers.] I don't know. It's complicated. Quentin has a big heart, and he loves me. But it took a year of us with no other options for him to want more than to be friends, where I was enamored more or less the day I met him, even if I didn't do anything about it. And I put the brakes on, because that's usually what I do, but it didn't take him long to find a pretty lady to fall for too. If she'd asked, I think he would have made it just the two of them. And if I thought it'd make them happy, I'd have let them. But she never asked, and then she died. So it was just us and Teddy. We never talked about it, we just kept going.
If he asked, I'd say yes, because I can't say no to Q about anything that matters. But he needed more than me, and he didn't come to me until there wasn't any other option. Here, there's other options everywhere. I don't need it to be just us - and it's a moot point here, given it's illegal. But I don't think without that time with no one else there, I'd ever be his first choice. So part of me wouldn't want to try to be each other's only anything, because I don't want to find out for sure I couldn't be enough to keep him happy. I'd rather keep a touch of mystery to it. [Eliot smiles ruefully.] If that makes any sense at all, I have no idea.
[He reaches to squeeze Caleb's wrist lightly.] It's not greedy. But I'm happy to hear it. And yes. In this together, friends, lovers, most likely partners in crime at some point. So lets take in a very pretty blond together. And if once in a while you want a night alone with him, then I'll go make some trouble with Margo or Q.