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[He comes back to so many missed messages and calls from Caleb and he wants very much to send him some kind of message...but he has to bathe and tend to Jon and Martin's injuries before he does or he'll be too divided on both. As soon as he's split away to hole up in his room to breathe, he curls up against the head of his bed, unwilling to lay down like his body would prefer. Caleb first.]

I'm back. I'm [Alright seems a stretch.] I'm safe.

[Even typing the words causes his eyes to sting, but he swallows it down in case Caleb calls him. He didn't need Chris crying on him over the phone, it was clear the city had been through it's own problems.]

[ Caleb has barely gotten back to the townhouse and curled up with Nate when, as he's reaching for his phone, it buzzes. His heart leaps at seeing Chris' name, the person he was about to text.

The words are easy, simple, they don't say much, and they make his chest ache to be with Chris as much as he is with Nate. ]

Safe is a start. How are you? Can I call or not now?

[ They both have people in their lives beyond each other and they've balanced that so well. In this moment Caleb wants none of that. He wants his boyfriends and he wants to do anything he can to make it okay and yet knows he likely can't ever truly do anything to fix this. Even as much as he wishes it had been him and not them. ]

[It’s quick enough and he’s a little surprised as much as he’s not. Caleb always pulled himself in too many directions, it made Chris dizzy as much as he loved him for it all the same.]

Didn't know if you might be busy. You can call, if you have a second.

[His fingers hover over the phone for a second, old habits warring with that broken inhibition he’d clung to in the pit. He’d held Jacob while he died. It was too easy to imagine the same with his other boyfriend just through this screen.]

Id like to hear your voice.

Edited 2022-10-06 14:42 (UTC)

[ There's no hesitation once Chris says he can. He hits dial, not even waiting for greetings, his voice soft as he speaks. ]

Nate's resting. We're a pile of humans and pets on the couch. How are you? Really? How are you doing?

[There's an audible sigh from Chris, Caleb's voice lifting a weight he'd still been carrying.]

Better for hearing you. I'm holed up in my room. Jon and Martin need some time to themselves and I...I do too. I'm- ['fine' lingers behind his lips.]

I'm not doing great. Too many hands on me this last week though, I'm happy with my empty room, if I'm honest. Think a person pile'd be too much right now.

[ He had partially expected Chris to say he's fine, to brush it off. That he doesn't means a lot to Caleb, still not knowing what happened to them but only imagining the worse. ]

Take the time you need, Chris. If you need me to bring you anything, just ask. I... I want to see you. I do.

[ His voice cracks and he pauses to stop himself, swallowing hard. ]

But I think I can understand that, even if I have no idea what happened. Just... I'm here for you. You know that. Whatever you need.

I know it. [It's quiet and helplessly fond, even if he's really not sure what he needs either. Now that he's had over an hour with no one in his space, he's pretty sure even a gentle brush on his arm might make him jump but, at the same time, part of him wanted the grounding feeling of Caleb's lips against his. Just something that was familiar and not mired in all of that.]

I don't suppose you know how to open a portal just for a kiss, do you? He shakes his head to himself and curls his legs in tighter against his chest.]

Do you want to know what happened or is it more helpful not to?

[ Despite it all, that question makes him smile. It eases something tense and worried in his chest. Nothing is going to be right for anyone. Not for a long time he suspects, but each step is one more in trying to make things better.

So he's unable to help but consider that. ]

You know, I've been working on them. I think I could manage that when you want it.

[ Then that darker question and he realizes he doesn't have to consider the answer. ]

Which would be better for you, Chris? I'll listen to every moment if you think sharing will help. Or just parts of it. If talking about it now is too much, I understand that as well.

[He shouldn't ask Caleb to push like that for him. Pressing his finer touch with telekenisis was one thing, this felt...selfish. He was selfish, but he tried his best not to put it on those he loved. He should be selfish for them, not at them, right?]

Soon...[Now...but the word doesn't make it out of his mouth.]

I can tell you the picture of it, at least. They took us and kept us in a pit. Not a lot of room, nearly couldn't huddle to yourself without threat of kicking another. Dirty conditions, limited food and water which were treated as a privilege, one taken away the more you caused trouble. Causing trouble got you beat and sprayed down with salt water to sting and bruise...sometimes other things for the subs there.

There was loud noise nearly all the time and when it stopped and the bright lights would go down was random and untraceable to keep nerves on edge. Some people died cause of it all.

[Impersonal. Neutral, and fact-facing...detached kept Caleb safe but informed...but he wants to tell him, he can feel the press of it as much as habit tells him he shouldn't. He grits his teeth and buries his face in his knees a moment to try and keep his emotions in check.]

Whenever you want, Chris. Whatever you need.

[ He can't imagine how bad it was, but he's getting camp vibes. Worse even probably, and he knows how bad he was after that.

And he means those words more than ever as Chris talks about what happened. About those injured, about those killed. He hadn't been sure, but now there's confirmation and he isn't sure what to make of it. No, he does. Do what he can for those that have been through it. Those he loves. ]

Fucking hell, Chris. I can't even... Did you... Someone... Who, Chris?

[ The city isn't that big that they don't know most of the city, at least in passing from seeing them on the network or such. It's possible someone he knew died there, someone important to Chris. ]

Jon?

[That tugs at him and he can feel his eyes sting. Caleb was too kind to him. Too kind for him. He should be curled up with Nate, not offering to teleport across the city just for a kiss.

The question itself isn't easier for another reason, but at least he can fight down the panic that arises for the suggestion. One was hard enough. If he'd lost both...thank gods Caleb hadn't been there too.]

No...not- Jon's here. He's...okay. [Or will be, as surely as he will be.]

Did you know Jacob Frye?

[His voice feels thin in his own ears, a waver he tries to forgive himself for.]

[ Even as he text Chris, he watches Nate texting whomever he's talking to - the handful of people he loves and cares for - and it feels right. This is how it should be, and he feels lucky to have it. So he's there to do what he can for them. Life has been rough, but not that Hell. Especially not in the Down and locked in the theatre.

Okay is how most of them will be and Caleb suspects that way for a long time.

He hears that tone though, and that is all that matters. That and the past tense, just in case he wasn't sure. ]

I know of him. I'm so sorry. For him and for you.

Are you sure you don't need me there? Even for a minute? I'll understand if you're not up for it but I can be there. Nate may leave soon to see his John or Nick. You aren't drawing me away from him.

[He nods to himself. He should really have them meet, the two men who'd so lovingly taken up a title of 'boyfriend' for him. He was always so careful about keeping his relationships separate, but maybe he shouldn't. With exception to Jon, there was no reason Caleb and Jacob and Rhys wouldn't get along and have some fun together...but later. When things weren't so raw and Jacob wasn't-

His next breath is harder and he feels weak for it, but his hand tightens around his phone as he opens his mouth-]

Will you come? Marzipan Terrace in the Up- Jon's house.

[ There is no hesitation in his answer. Only taking a moment to work out things on his end, make sure that he isn't deserting one man he loves for another, assuring Nate that it's okay if he checks on the others. It's easy between them how they handle the men they love, the things they share, and the people they share one another with and he's glad for that. ]

Send me the address? I haven't been there but I think I can manage it with knowledge of where it is.

Is it better if I try for outside of the house rather than inside?

[ He's trying to be okay with the different sides of Jon Sims around the men he loves, and to not do anything to start a war there either. ]

Yeah...hold on.

[He sends the number on Marzipan Terrace before continuing.]

If you think you can hit my room directly, you're welcome to come inside, otherwise...maybe outside'd be better to meet you first at least. There's a balcony around the back.

[If Caleb missed and startled Martin or Jon, that wouldn't be particularly kind.]

Yeah, think I'll go with outside. Feels invasive to drop into the living room or something.

I'll meet you on the balcony. See you soon.

[ And he knows he can get to the balcony from the ground easily enough.

It takes a moment for him to open the portal but a moment later he's on ground level, just down from the balcony. He hasn't used this magic all that often, not since the fight with Chase but a moment later he leaps up and lands on the balcony easily.

Despite all that is going on, he's kind of proud of himself. ]

[Chris finds a sweater to put on with his pajamas, then heads for the balcony at the end of the hall that looked out on the garden. He's barely got the door closed behind him when Caleb simply jumps up like gravity was nothing to him. Chris gives him a small smile, his own pride for his boyfriend in it.

He reaches out almost immediately, fingers tangling in Caleb's shirt as he steps in close. He doesn't want touch...but he also needs it. Or maybe needs it from Caleb, he's not sure. His head's still a mess of static and fear and grief he's trying to sort.
He presses his face into Caleb's shoulder.]

Thank you for...accommodating me. Gods, I missed you.

[ Seeing Chris is everything he needs in that moment. Seeing the look in his eyes, that way he holds onto his shirt as he presses in against him like that.

Emotions well up in his chest like he's drowning, sliding his hands tenderly over Chris' arms and carefully touching him with a delicate caress. Nothing keeping him close, nothing capturing him to him. Just offering what he can.]

I missed you too, and you know, Chris. Any time you need me. Anywhere. You're stuck with me.

[ At least for as long as they have. ]

[He huffs and latches his other hand at Caleb's hip.]

You say that like you're required to answer my call. You're not.
You also say 'stuck' like I'm not lucky enough to claim that and be better for it.

No, it means that given the choice? I want to be with you.

[ Sliding his arms a bit more around Chris, pressing a soft kiss to the tip of his nose with a smile. ]

I feel the same, you know. I am lucky for what I have here, and you're a big part of that. Why I mean it. If you need me, just ask. And if you can't find it in you to ask, I'll still be there.

[ Because he knows Chris, and he'll offer like he had today in case that's easier. ]

[There's too much in him. Too much static and exhaustion and latent fear and he pulls back to look at Caleb and for a moment his imagination provides what it might look like to see those beautiful eyes go dim. There's too much noise when his chest clenches tight.

He presses forward, an arm sliding around behind Caleb's back while the one in his shirt twists so tight his knuckles go white and Chris leans in to kiss him so maybe he won't notice that Chris' eyes have started to sting.

He should say something. Thank you, to start. I love you is a good option. I'll work on it might be a stretch, but it would be something.

He doesn't say anything, just pours it all into kissing his boyfriend, his oldest friend here. This sweet man he didn't deserve, but would keep close all the same.]

[ Caleb has heard a little of what they've been through and it's enough to set his imagination off. He can only imagine just how bad it really was and how much it's hurt Chris and Nate and others. He might have been left here alone but he hasn't been through everything they have.

So he offers all he can to Chris.

Holding him tight, the kiss fierce and filled with emotions he wants to show to the man he loves. To show him he's here for him, that he'll do whatever he can for him. That no matter what this place does, they have one another.

Barely breaking the kiss, his lips brushing Chris' as he speaks. ]

I love you. I'm here for you.

[ No reassurances that its okay or they'll fix things. Just that he'll be there for Chris and do all he can for him. ]

Contact

text; un: ravens | Forward dated to early evening on the 7th

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