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No, I mean...

[He takes a breath, hoping this isn't going to cause problems but he wants to be clear with Eliot from the start. He feels close to Eliot and he never wants there to be problems between them.

He leans in, returning that kiss before he rushes on, getting the words out before he stops himself. He just wants to make this right.]

I meant me doing it though I know he has others in his life. We've talked about that a bit. Like you. We've shared some very intimate moments, beyond sex. He's... He's kinda mine. Maybe? Could be?

[He winces even as he says it because this place doesn't let that be and Eliot might not like it and he doesn't want to screw this up for Francis because Eliot would be so good for him.]

Well, I think one day I might ask him to wear something for me, us.

[He sighs.]

Wow, I feel like an idiot, and like I'm in high school again, but with way more stakes.

I don't do monogamy. You know that from the bells. But some people are more important to me than others. Like loving Nate. Like how I care about you, and Francis.

I'm sure, but I need to know that isn't going to be a problem, and I'll talk to him too. I don't want him thinking I'm cutting him off from others, or that I want that. I just... Dinner. That would be good.

[Eliot's head tips as he listens, and he makes a little soft sound of reassurance.] Caleb. [His voice is quiet and full of affection.] You're not an idiot. This place turns things upside down and inside out. If you feel that way about him, and he feels that way about you, then it's a good thing. And if you want him to wear something for you, then you should ask him.

[Eliot tips his chin up a second, looking up at the ceiling.] You're still young, and you know I'm technically older than I look. So you don't know what you do or don't do until you get there and find that something changes. Or maybe it won't. I've never figured I had a monogamous bone in my body, but for a while, that was all I wanted.

This place just doesn't give you the option to figure it out on your own with Francis. So this is probably the best way to do that. But, Caleb-

[Eliot sits up again and catches his fingers beneath Caleb's chin, turning him to look at Eliot.] We signed the contracts, we know where the city thinks we stand. But between us? If the two of you have something, and you need it to be just you - then tell me. I'll just be the name on the paper who sleeps in the room next door, and you two can take care of each other if that's what you want. And if not, then the three of us can figure it out together, all right? [Eliot leans in to give him a soft kiss.] We can start with dinner, and go from there.

It's not to that point yet. I don't think. I'm not even sure what I am thinking. I've loved others, and I've been in love here that I've been sure of for over a month.

[He can't say when he fell in love with Nate, or when Nate loved him. It's just always been them being honest that they do. Maybe it started that night of the bite, when he'd been driven to seek out those he cared about and he had found Nate.

He's quiet a moment, knowing he shouldn't ask about it but he can't stop himself.]

Would you be monogamous again for him? I mean, if that's what you want, you should try and make it happen, Eliot. For both of you.

I know I wouldn't be. Not for Francis. Not for Nate. And not because I just named two people.

[He says the last with a small laugh.

He stares into Eliot's eyes and immediately gives the tiniest twist of his head, not pulling away but saying no with that shake.]

No, not like that. I want to be with you. I want you and him to have good times and be close. This isn't me asking for that, because it's not who I am. I'm greedy like that.

[He says it with a smile.]

I think I worried you would want that with him, and that it would cause a problem for you if he and I have that kind of a relationship. But you are not a name on paper. I knew that when we contracted and when the bell wore off, I think we both knew it. Don't we? We're friends and lovers and in this together.

You don't have to rush to figure it out, either. You can just like him and like the idea of where it goes.

[The question catches Eliot off guard and his smile fades, and he looks away, thoughtful, but that touch of melancholy that only Caleb saw in him now, most of the time, and it's quiet when he finally answers.] I don't know. It's complicated. Quentin has a big heart, and he loves me. But it took a year of us with no other options for him to want more than to be friends, where I was enamored more or less the day I met him, even if I didn't do anything about it. And I put the brakes on, because that's usually what I do, but it didn't take him long to find a pretty lady to fall for too. If she'd asked, I think he would have made it just the two of them. And if I thought it'd make them happy, I'd have let them. But she never asked, and then she died. So it was just us and Teddy. We never talked about it, we just kept going.

If he asked, I'd say yes, because I can't say no to Q about anything that matters. But he needed more than me, and he didn't come to me until there wasn't any other option. Here, there's other options everywhere. I don't need it to be just us - and it's a moot point here, given it's illegal. But I don't think without that time with no one else there, I'd ever be his first choice. So part of me wouldn't want to try to be each other's only anything, because I don't want to find out for sure I couldn't be enough to keep him happy. I'd rather keep a touch of mystery to it. [Eliot smiles ruefully.] If that makes any sense at all, I have no idea.

[He reaches to squeeze Caleb's wrist lightly.] It's not greedy. But I'm happy to hear it. And yes. In this together, friends, lovers, most likely partners in crime at some point. So lets take in a very pretty blond together. And if once in a while you want a night alone with him, then I'll go make some trouble with Margo or Q.

[Caleb sighs, shifting in closer to Eliot just because of that look in his eyes. It takes everything in Caleb not to do something to bring them back together, to try and get Eliot to talk to Quentin. He can't believe there's a way this other man couldn't look at Eliot who obviously loves him so much and not want to love him back.

Yet Caleb knows that because he's been in his mind. He has seen that love. Would he have known that without the bells?]

I'm going to say something, and this is definitely coming from the bias that I like you a lot, Eliot. [And as he says that, he leans in and kisses him tenderly, almost chastely.] I can not imagine a way that someone that knows you couldn't care about you. And as for the legalities of it? Fuck that. So we'll find ways to cover for you both. Magic to hide things. Just don't go getting on your knees for him in public.

[Smiling slightly, teasing him even as he gives him a look.]

You know that thing we're doing right now about Francis and us? You could try that. I'm told talking is important. With relationships. So you don't drink the wrong thing. Like that.

[Because it's easier to joke and tease, even when he's being as honest as he can be.]

The same goes for you both. I know you like him and he likes you. Trust me. I'm not the jealous type. I want you happy. I want him happy. I actually am happy. Before you ask. I never thought I would be here but I really am.

[Eliot's arm comes up around Caleb easily when he moves in closer, tactile as always and happy to have someone to pet and cuddle up with. He kisses back and smiles a little.] I appreciate the sentiment. And he does care, he does love me. He just loves me like a best friend he flirts a little with, not the way I love him. Maybe he could love me, but there were triggers that led us there last time that aren't here. And he shouldn't have to know all of them if he doesn't have to when he's got a second chance here. [He pauses and then adds] Also, a moment of appreciation for how many times I've said the l-word, that would have given me an aneurysm a few months ago.

[He snorts, ducking his head to nip at the shell of Caleb's ear.] It's a little more complicated when there's multiple timelines, a wife, a son, a girlfriend, a different lifetime, possession, and death involved. And because I am forever the weakest link, I did already cave and offer to tell him just so he would stop being pissed off and disappointed in me. He decided he was better off not knowing on his own. And he's not wrong.

[Eliot smiles at that, squeezing Caleb lightly.] My own ridiculous bullshit aside - I'm happy you're happy. I'm glad if I can help with that, whether it's a contract, many blowjobs, or making sure there's a cute sweet blond around for you. I'm glad Margo's happy and I want Q happy too, whether or not it's with me. I've seen things end badly so many times - you got the gist of my groundhog day adventures I think. That's honestly mostly what I want now. My people safe and happy and zero chance of me housing any kind of god monster. The rest is a bonus round.

[Whatever it is that allowed that connection between them, it's made so much easier to lean in together, to talk and share like they are now. The hard barriers are down and gone, and so now they have ones of working out things between them and how to continue this relationship.]

You deserve more than that, Eliot. You're an amazing man who has been through so much. You don't know that it isn't still there without the triggers. You just have to work on it and see what you can have. I mean, not everyone gets a magic bell to work out the hard parts.

[It's a joke, knowing it's maybe not fair but unable to help himself. If only it might make Eliot relax and maybe looking to a chance between them.]

You aren't weak, Eliot. In no way. And I know you didn't mean it that way but I'm going to remind you of that, just like I'm going to remind you that you deserve the love you want. The love you know you've had.

[He tenses slightly, frowning at that. ]

No one should be disappointed in you.

[No matter what there is between them, Eliot is his friend and Caleb will defend him. No matter what.]

Eliot, you help with me being happy by being you. I'm glad you're the one I contracted with. You're my friend and someone I trust. No matter what happens with me and others, with you and Quentin. Whatever there is, you're my friend, okay? And that means so much to me.

[It was something that had been a fight between him and his former dominant. Friendship as a start hadn't been enough and it had been rough on Caleb knowing he was constantly living up to expectations he hadn't agreed to or wanted.]

I'm happy and safe, and I'm here to help. With any of it. Even monsters if it happens.

[Eliot would have said going in that he absolutely wanted nothing to do with manufactured intimacy. And he'd still say that now. But in this one instance, it had worked out for the best because he'd gotten a friend and a confidant out of it when he sorely needed it. He would forever have Margo, but there were things Eliot wanted to shield her from too, so there were details he held back. With Caleb, the need to do that had been bypassed.]

I had that. [Eliot smiles and shrugs.] It wasn't perfect, and I don't exactly remember clearly and he doesn't remember at all. But technically, I already had a lifetime. Even greedy as I am, I know when to settle for a good thing. [Because he'd ruined any chance at anything else when Quentin died because of him. Q being alive here - it was more than enough. Eliot just can't help but feel the twinges. Love's a bitch.] That bell did come in handy though. I'm keeping it in mind for next year, maybe I'll send you in to ring with Francis and I'll bring you water and peek at the show now and then.

[Eliot reaches for Caleb's hand, his fingers running over Caleb's knuckles slowly.] I appreciate the confidence, but trust me when I say that I can definitely be weak, and often a shit, and definitely a coward. He's allowed to be frustrated or disappointed.

But you help me too. And yes. I'll make you a best friends forever bracelet if you want, but only if you don't tell Margo. To be honest I'd make her one but it probably wouldn't suit her style in five minutes and then she'd toss it in a drawer. [Eliot gives him another quick, soft kiss.] Honestly meeting you is one of the better parts of this place, and given there's one best friend here, and another one back from the dead, it's a pretty exacting list to be on. Lets try to steer clear of monsters though.

[Caleb shifts, moving to wrap his other arm around Eliot, snuggling in close to him and pressing soft kisses along his jaw. Trying to offer what comfort he could, to try and be there for him while wanting to do all he can to fight for Eliot having all he wants.

He knows it's wrong, but it just seems unfair that in his life before he had it and now has to face all the reasons he thinks he can't have it here.]

Yeah well, who says a lifetime's enough? But I'll let it go and be here for you, because I want to.

[He really feel he knows Eliot and Eliot knows him and he's glad to have their connection and friendship.]

I bet they don't let us ring without a dominant, but then maybe the three of us can. I... Francis really does deserved to be loved for and cared about and I'm glad that he us and this place to try and make things better for him.

[With a chuckle he crosses his heart.]

Not a word, though I'll gladly wear it. [He hugs Eliot, resting his cheek on Eliot's shoulder for a moment. ] We'll take care of one another, no matter what this place does to us. No matter what.

[Eliot accepts the cuddling and closeness readily, smiling and wrapping Caleb up tight. He's glad he has this, with Caleb. He'd still have Margo, so he'd be getting by regardless. But he knows he wouldn't be coping half as well without Caleb around.] It's not, apparently, but it's better than not having it. And thank you. [Eliot kisses him sweetly. And then laughs ruefully.]

You're probably right. But I'd ring with both of you. We'd have to warn him going it what happens though, assuming we all are still game by the time it comes around again. He might actually like to keep a few secrets, we already gave up all of ours. And he does. We can spoil the hell out of him.

[Eliot hugs him back.] It's a deal. I'll always be there when you need me. And also when you want me, because, and I don't know if I've mentioned this, you're very sexy.

[Snuggling in against Eliot, he sighs softly. He enjoys this, needing this between them and to have this to help him get through this place. Eliot was one of the main things that changed his life in this place. ]

I'm here for you, Eliot. They threw us together not realizing we'd use it to get one another through this place.

Secrets? What are those?

[He laughs though. In this room between the two of them there are no secrets. Unless they've been made in the last month.]

I trust you Eliot, and this place made that hard. So I'm glad you're my dominant.

Oh? Am I? Wow, next to you that is a compliment.

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