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[ipswichson]

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❝ Caleb Danvers. Son of Ipswich. Leave a message.❞

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[ipswichson]

Would I want to never make that mistake, no matter what the person was like because they're not you? Yeah. I don't ever want to make that mistake if I can avoid it.

Would I do it if it's something that would bother you? Absolutely not.

[chrisisofaith]

No I meant

[What did he mean? How did he put this feeling into words?]

Would you want to leave a permanent mark on me? Something like a show of [every word sounds too harsh or too presumptive or not enough] attachment?

[ipswichson]

[Caleb stares at the messages for longer than he means to, worrying he'll say the wrong thing.

Then he just goes with the most honest answer he has.]

More than I think you know, and its a mutual desire for you to do the same to me.

If you want.

[chrisisofaith]

[There’s a surge of emotion through him and he wishes, not for the first time, that he was better at this. Did other people feel things, know what they were feeling, and know what to do about it without needing to analyze every angle? That would be nice.

He can pick out two things immediately: thrumming anticipation and sharp fear.]

I think I’d kind of love it if you did? The claim of it. I don’t deny I travel many beds, but there’s very very few I’m in love with enough to let mark me permanent. It’d be nice if they did.

As for the reverse, the sentiment is the same but the thought just sent a chill in my bones
What if I fuck it up?
What if it’s not good enough?
What if you hate whatever it is?

[ipswichson]

[ Part of Caleb wishes they had this talk in person but then he's glad it's not. It's talking it out and the emotions, and love, and all of it can come later when Caleb isn't likely to get too sappy about this.

Because it's how he feels. All of this, having this talk and planning this, feels amazing. ]

Who we sleep with has nothing to do with who we love. And who we love has nothing to do with loving the next we choose.

One thing I've always had was the ability to love wholly, whoever I wanted to love and that hasn't changed here.

I would love to mark you with my love anytime you're willing.

As for you marking me? You can't mess it up.
Not if it's coming from you, about how you feel.
But if you're not ready for that, there's no pressure.
Just know that for me? You can't mess it up and there's no way I could ever hate anything that shows your love for me.

[chrisisofaith]

[He thinks a long moment, his fingers hovering over the keys. He knows his real answer, he knows how he feels and how much it would mean to him to have that mark now that he’s thinking about it, but that isn’t all that’s in his head.
He feels silly typing it out.]

Im afraid you’ll change your mind or realize I’m not that great a fit and then be stuck with this permanent mark as reminder

[ipswichson]

I wouldn't. I would still cherish what we had that made me want that mark to begin with.
I love you, and I can't imagine anything making me regret that. Even if things somehow changed between us.

But I want both of us comfortable with things.
If you aren't ready, I can wait for you to mark me but the offer always stands, and I'll always be happy for it to happen.