Understandable, and I get it. We can be there for him until he finds someone.
I don't ever want to see you go through that again, Nate. I know it's not my say but I worry about you and I love you. We'll do what we can, and not just you.
it actually is your say. you're not just my submissive you're my boyfriend
i wouldn't want to bring anyone into our lives that you weren't 100% okay with or that you didn't think was good for me. if you thought that i'd listen to you, c.
believe me i don't either it's not a mistake i want to make again. i mean it, i would listen to you if you thought i was involved with someone who wasn't good for me i would hear you. i feel like i can't always trust my own judgment. not when it comes to this.
I don't treat you any differently than I do my friends back home.
It's how I'm used to being because if I didn't, I could die. And it's not much different here. Without you, I'm a target more than ever. I feel like I should apologize for feeling safe with you after all I've been through here.
Do I assume you mean recently since you think it was stupid?
i wanted her and i didn't want to back down and i wasn't afraid of her, in that moment besides i cursed her, i knew she wouldn't kill me. she couldn't have
it wasn't need, it was just. pure hedonism, i guess and if i'm honest that's what it is most of the time i'm not like a great person, caleb. i don't want you to think i am
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I don't ever want to see you go through that again, Nate. I know it's not my say but I worry about you and I love you.
We'll do what we can, and not just you.
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it actually is your say. you're not just my submissive you're my boyfriend
i wouldn't want to bring anyone into our lives that you weren't 100% okay with
or that you didn't think was good for me. if you thought that i'd listen to you, c.
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I think sometimes I just still feel grateful that I can be contracted to you after everything, you know?
But I will remember that and honestly that would be my biggest thing right now.
I never want to see you have to go through what you are again, okay?
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it's not a mistake i want to make again.
i mean it, i would listen to you
if you thought i was involved with someone who wasn't good for me i would hear you. i feel like i can't always trust my own judgment. not when it comes to this.
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Whatever it takes. We're going to take care of one another.
So we'll talk, okay? About those you care about, about if you want to contract with someone.
You know I'm here for you. No matter what.
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but i know we're on the same page
and he and i are very far from being a couple, anyway
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You trying to avoid that because of Nick?
I mean, you're talking the one that's his dominant, right?
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no not that doctor
i mean THE doctor, the one i want to contract with me because his dom left
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My brain did not go to a name lol
He still resisting? How much more time does he have?
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he told me he needed time
i just hope he says yes soon
you're okay with him, though?
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Yeah. He seems okay.
And I don't want someone in jail.
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honestly i wouldn't be surprised
i'll talk to him.
so uh
you want to talk about kyle?
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Nick talks about him enough for everyone.
Just be careful. For all the obvious reasons.
I don't want the next horrific video to be you.
But also fuck their rules. If that makes sense.
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half of it was arrestable, but they never came for me
don't know why
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I'm so >.< at you.
Oh wait, no I'm not.
You have to wonder though, don't you?
Why some and not others?
Not that I want you punished. I couldn't stand that.
Maybe they know though it wouldn't change anything.
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especially when it's so fucking stupid
i try to keep it under wraps, though. i don't flaunt it
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And you don't owe me any explanations or answers.
I just worry about you.
You're the most important person in my life.
I'll do whatever I can to keep you safe and happy.
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he's helped me.
he's a good person
i promise
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I'm not worried about him.
This place sometimes gets to my head.
That's all. Promise.
I trust you with my life, Nate. I'm not worried about who you trust. Okay?
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okay
but like i maybe don't always
you shouldn't put me on a pedestal, i've done stupid things too
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It's how I'm used to being because if I didn't, I could die.
And it's not much different here. Without you, I'm a target more than ever.
I feel like I should apologize for feeling safe with you after all I've been through here.
Do I assume you mean recently since you think it was stupid?
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like right after the last finder
she saw my ad that said i was into fangs and she started hitting on me, and i hit on her back, and it just, like
she hit my pain kink really hard
and i think i might've given her one of her own
and it was really good
but like objectively getting in bed with her while she was minus her humanity was probably not the cleverest thing i've ever done
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Your life I guess. Literally.
Guess I'm glad you're finding people to give you what you need.
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i didn't have a need, i just
i wanted her
and i didn't want to back down
and i wasn't afraid of her, in that moment
besides i cursed her, i knew she wouldn't kill me. she couldn't have
it wasn't need, it was just. pure hedonism, i guess
and if i'm honest that's what it is most of the time
i'm not like a great person, caleb. i don't want you to think i am
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