probably but maybe while you're in jail it's good you're not any of the above. enough you're going through this by yourself.
we'll get through this when you start feeling those things though. even if you don't believe i'll still be there, i will. as long as this place will let me and still working on beyond.
[Caleb thinks about what Nate must be feeling. The loss, the cut off from what he had hoped for the guilt, the pain. No wonder he's not feeling anything.
Caleb wonders if he's shut down, and he isn't sur what to do if he has, but he'll be there for him.]
You will though. With time you will. And if you don't, we'll go from there. Okay?
[He can't have him worrying that Caleb would leave if he didn't wake up, but he can't help but hope he will. ]
[There's no hesitation in his reply. He should but he can't. Not when Nate has coped with all he has in a short time. All he can do is his best to be there for him to get through this.]
Pick me up tomorrow soon as they let us out. We'll take care of it. Okay? Together.
Because I don't want to be either, and I don't want you to be alone.
[He doesn't want to be alone anymore. Not to just wallow in his thoughts. To think about how this place is, what it thinks of him, and what he has to lose. Mostly of all he doesn't want to think about that loss that they all face, that had led them to this.]
We will be. We're going to be okay. I trust you in that, Nate. I know we will.
[ Right now, the reality of their failure is a fact in Nate's mind. The emotional side of it can't hit him yet. It will.
They know for certain now that they can't do anything about what they love being taken from them. The people they lose will be gone for good. That includes each other.
It means that all they have, all they are, has to be here in this moment. ]
we have each other. if that's all we can count on then that's enough
i think you're a better boyfriend to me than i am to you quite frankly. i promise you, i won't let you be alone either. i'll get you out of your head. whatever comes next, we'll face it together.
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enough you're going through this by yourself.
we'll get through this when you start feeling those things though.
even if you don't believe i'll still be there, i will. as long as this place will let me and still working on beyond.
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you've always had my back
stephen hasn't. he never wanted me to do this. i shouldn't be surprised.
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i'm still sorry.
we'll get through this, and we'll work out things.
with the house, with our life, and with where things go from here.
once i'm not sitting here being glad i'm not popular.
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but i'm glad they are. i'm glad you're safe.
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Are you still seeing them? I stopped seeing them a couple of days ago and I don't know what to think about it.
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it stopped after three days
i fell asleep after, but it's like half of me forgot to wake up again
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Caleb wonders if he's shut down, and he isn't sur what to do if he has, but he'll be there for him.]
You will though. With time you will.
And if you don't, we'll go from there. Okay?
[He can't have him worrying that Caleb would leave if he didn't wake up, but he can't help but hope he will. ]
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i don't want to be in my head anymore.
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Pick me up tomorrow soon as they let us out. We'll take care of it. Okay? Together.
Because I don't want to be either, and I don't want you to be alone.
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but i have to go to the city to try and get out of my permanent contract with stephen, and then i have to move out
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Don't do any of it alone. Please?
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And I need it too. To focus on you, and to be out of my head.
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yes, come with me tomorrow. we'll stay together
then we'll go home together.
we'll be okay.
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[He doesn't want to be alone anymore. Not to just wallow in his thoughts. To think about how this place is, what it thinks of him, and what he has to lose. Mostly of all he doesn't want to think about that loss that they all face, that had led them to this.]
We will be. We're going to be okay.
I trust you in that, Nate. I know we will.
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They know for certain now that they can't do anything about what they love being taken from them. The people they lose will be gone for good. That includes each other.
It means that all they have, all they are, has to be here in this moment. ]
we have each other. if that's all we can count on then that's enough
i'll take care of you. i promise.
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[He's glad they're texting where Nate can't see him cry, can't hear the soft sobs as he clutches at the device desperately.]
i know you will. there's no doubt about that.
just know you're not alone. we won't let you be. you have so many that love you and we're here for you
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you've never let me down, caleb. not even once
i think you're a better boyfriend to me than i am to you quite frankly. i promise you, i won't let you be alone either. i'll get you out of your head. whatever comes next, we'll face it together.
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you've done so much for me and taught me so much.
we'll make it though. i love you. i'm here for you.
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even with adding the cats to the house.
which is meant to make you smile. even a tiny bit./font>
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one of them's more chaotic than i am if you can believe it
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i never had pets growing up. i like our growing menagerie.
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i'd never be without them now though.
i hope they're ok without us.
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stephen has them and will watch them. tempest has likely been under my bed the whole time.
you have someone watching the dogs?
[Obviously the new house rule is that any major undertakings can only include two of the three of them from now on.]
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